40 Things to Do When You Already Have 40 Things to Do

1. Take a nap.

2. Call an old friend.

3. Think about reading a book.

4. Remember Garry Shandling.

5. Rebalance your budget, giving yourself more leisure funds.

6. Listen to one song off of an album and decide you don't like the album.

7. Really figure out if you enjoy sushi.

8. Get a little bit of rest.

9. Write the actual ending of The Sopranos.

10. Disavow a sports figure.

11. Count your blinks.

12. See if you can swallow a penny without dying.

13. Reorganize your bookshelf by color, realize that's dumb, re-reorganize.

14. Make sure you're not wasting any electricity.

15. Mull over how bad it would have to get to eat a slice of bread untoasted.

16. Chip away at the patriarchy.

17. Look up how many pennies a billion dollars is (it's 10 Billion pennies, sorry).

17. Decide whether a catfish is more fish or more cat.

18. Have a glass of wine and truly convince yourself you will not have another.

19. Write a letter to your congressperson about something you care about.

20. Just relax a little.

21. Relearn algebra.

22. Write a secret on a piece of paper and slip it into a strangers pocket.

23. Earnestly attempt to catch a ghost.

24. Believe in yourself for like five minutes.

25. Reflect on the existence of Joe Pesci.

26. Look up the difference between matcha and mochi.

27. Praise a god that is not your own.

28. Play FMK with the Backstreet Boys & N*SYNC until there's only one boy left standing.

29. Take some stuff to the resale shop for $ and then spend the $ there.

30. Go to the library and realize taxes can be used for cool stuff, if you want.

31. Delete your Facebook for a few hours, just to feel that feeling.

32. Find a dog and pet it by any means necessary.

33. Appreciate nature.

34. Purchase an app with a recurring subscription you're unaware of.

35. Feed the birds willfully and call the cops on yourself for doing so.

36. Really figure out when punk died.

37. Write a super long letter to your grandmother.

38. Finally get that passport.

39. Walk into a bank, laugh super hard, exit the bank.

40. Emancipate someone for no personal gain.